"Welcome to the Gun Show!"
"I was just thinking back to childhood, when my momma was chasing me with the belt..."
"I'm not getting wet tonight!"
"Momma, this is for you."
"Back home, in Tennessee, we had a mud wrestling contest..."
"I used to be 50 pounds heavier, but i worked really really hard to get the weight off. Now I'm here and I'm going to show everyone what you can do when you drop the weight..."
"She fights though Helga, but Helga is big and strong..."
"All you have to do is believe in yourself"
"Let's go to the Subway reply..."
"He was a little bit slippery, but it was just like hog wrestling at the fair..."
"It's a quality edition of leg wrastlin'"
"My momma's here and she told me to make her get wet"
"Now it's time to hang tough with the men."
"You had more moves than a bowl of Jello up there!"
"I'm smelling fear, I'm smelling blood, and I'm gonna eat you."
"Ever wonder how you get a deep thigh bruise?... That's how."
"I'm agile. Like a... like a mongoose."
"I plan to give 110%"
"I plan to give it 110%"
"I give 110%"
"2:22! You are the baddest of the bad!"
"That's a warrior. That's an American Gladiator!"
I shit you not.
This is the awesomest show ever.