23 January 2009
To all Tighteners Up:
Friends, Tighteners, the time has come. The Report has sat neglected, vacant, unused, and unread for too long. I salute the few who have strung our existence along from month to month, not letting the dream die, not letting crimes against tightness go untightened.
Failblog's meteoric rise has proven that the world is hungry for images and movies of failure, of wiffle balls to the crotch, of spectacular automotive accidents, falls, miscommunications, and hubris. Our narrative shall rise again.
Tighteners, it is time that we tightened by tightening anew. I implore you: take up your qwerty, your cellphone camera and your quip, and let us resurrect the Report.
Yours in Tightness,