Dearest Interns,
I'm so glad you are here. Welcome. Now kindly shut up and don't talk.
No, I don't want to hear about the student newspaper - nope not about your friends who know someone who knows someone who used to work for Hillary Clinton either. Simple one word answers to polite obligatory questions like "Where do you go to school?" are adequate and frankly preferred in email form.
Why are you still talking?
I hate to be the one to tell you, you have decided to pursue a career in a dying industry, basically like graduating with a degree in 8 track repair.
But if you insist on sticking around,the following things are untight: talking, running through the office to flirt with make co-workers by offering them baked goods - it's not professional and that guy could be your dad, asking me for work to do - if I need you I'll find you, approaching my desk, using the word "passion," talking.
Thanks so much.
xo - Brenda
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4 comments:
I love you.
Also, please stop purchasing your work attire from the store posted below.
Don't you guys remember when you were interns? Have we all gotten so jaded that we don't remember being excited by doing simple inane things but doing them in an office wearing a suit and tie? I for one salute interns. They remind me of my youth and the drive, energy, and innocence I had before I realized that I wasn't the special little butterfly destined for great things my Mom and teachers kept telling me I was.
I remember nothing.
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