18 February 2008

Celebrating 1 Year of Tightness

Well everybody, today marks the 1-year anniversary of the creation of the Tighten Up Report. I fell pretty awesome about mentioning it in the 6 o'clock hour.

Here's a brief stock of our accomplishments:
  • Total Posts: 447
  • Total Hits: >33,000
  • Average Posts/Day: 1.22
  • Average posts/month: 32
  • Most posts in a month: 71 (October 2007)
  • Post tagged with some variant of "Cuba Gooding Jr.": 13 (terrible actor)
  • February 23, 2007: Invented the internet. Spectacular work, guys.
  • I have personally missed at least 3 opportunities to introduce 6 or more TUR contributors--who had never met personally but were in the same building and wouldn't have known each other from Adam--at social events. Gotta tighten that up.
  • Roanoke Public Library now respects the privacy of its patrons.
  • GWB still says "nukular"
  • 1,500 TUR cards procured; fewer than a dozen issued (or documented)
  • Cuba Gooding Jr. still working (note 5 films awaiting release in 08/09)
  • University of Virginia is unyieldingly obstinate in pursuing architectural mediocrity.
  • Cherries still have pits.
  • Huckabee is still running for president.
  • Ziggy still too preachy.
I'm too drunk at the moment to make this any funnier or reflective, so what the hell else have we done? Haven't we gotten anybody arrested? Did we get any of us arrested?

Click on the comment button below and let's make with the self-aggrandizement.


Matthew said...

I, um, sort of got detained in the fall by an officer of a law for having in public view a knife with which I cut avocados. That was untight.

mandy said...

I'm still waiting on OXO to send me a new garlic press . . .

Minna said...

Do you guys remember when I went to town on Viggo Mortensen for wearing too much orange? (I mean, geez: http://thetightenupreport.blogspot.com
Well, I haven't seen him wear any since then, have you? HAVE YOU?

Anonymous said...

I read the TUR everyday. But at an average of 1.22 new posts per day (is that accurate?), you all need to tighten up and document more. 1.22 is not enough! I want more! Silently, I conjure up posts as I make it through my day, and trust me, there are waaaaay more than 1.22. Try going to Whole Foods and use the "5 Items or Less" line. Tighten ups all around!

The Becca said...

I was asked to remove a couple of posts like 3 minutes after I put them up because I apparently "said too much". Discretion is not my specialty.

Brenda Starr said...

Congress is still broken ... but the rat decals are no longer at Trader Joe's ... at least there's that.

Pepper said...

I think the 1.22 figure is a little skewed by the early months when there was less posting, but I don't think it's skewed by much, especially given the general lack of activity on weekends.

Still, we do need to get the numbers up.